In Education, Family Support

QUESTION: How do you make mom friends and help your kid make kid friends?

ANSWERS: by Local Moms

friendshipbench_zimbabweOur school also uses a directory that lists kids and has parent contact info. When my kids come home and mention a friend they really like I will use the info in the directory to reach out to set things up. Once they assign a room parent they will usually send out a contact form.

Volunteer in class, field trips. Once your kid makes connections so can you with those parents. Birthdays help too. Or you could take a lead and go out and create a big class play date. Just send an invite to meet up at a park see what happens.

Early in the year I invite all the moms to stop for a quick cup of coffee right after drop off.  Not everyone is able to come but it’s a start!

I would physically pick up my daughter and let her play on the playground for a bit after school, it helped me to connect with other parents who were doing the same thing. It also let the crowds clear so we didn’t have to wait in traffic to leave.

Come a little early to pick up you can mingle with other parents. Walk up and introduce yourself works. As awkward as it is, especially if everyone seems to be friends already, introducing myself has started a lot of mom friendships for me.

friendship-bench_buddy2girlsI waited until my daughter made a friend. Then naturally I met those girls’ parents because the girls would be asking to play and would be walking out together after school.

I saw an adorable tiktok where an introverted mom made business cards for her extroverted child with his name and mom’s cell. Let him hand them out to school buddies, or friends he met at the park!

At the first open house you will find people that shine and go say hello!

Join scouting groups, after-school sports, enrichment classes.

When it seems that all the parents already know each other, it’s not a fantastic feeling for an introvert to have to start from scratch again. But the kids will make friends over the year. Hang in there.

I always get to know the kids first. I’ve made some awesome moms at school over the years.

I asked the teacher who my son seems to get along with, then wrote on a few sticky notes “Hi, our kids seem to get along. Play date sometime? My name and son’s name plus cell and then asked the teacher to give it to two friends’ parents. One responded and it was a good match.

My daughter made a friend in the car pickup line last year and the mom sent a note home with my daughter with her cell number to see if we could do a playdate. I’m not sure I would have ever thought to do that but I loved it!

Going to any class birthday party/school function helps to meet kids.

I’m considering making a back to school style party at a park every year to break the ice and do it in September. Give invitations to the teacher to send home.

In kindergarten I put notes to the other moms in all the kids’ backpacks. I invited  their kid over for a playdate sometime and left a phone number and said to text me. I had almost every kid over to my house. It was a great way to get exchanges going.

I made cards with my name and number for my son to pass to his friends to give to their parents. Give it a while it’s hard making new friends but well worth it!

friendship-carnegieVolunteer for as much as you can, in the class and general school stuff.  Go on field trips, do a big birthday party at the park and invite the class. Friends will happen eventually!

How about “half sleepovers” invite all the girls or boys, to come for games/crafts, pizza, ice cream, and a movie. Let parents know what movie beforehand and  everyone gets picked up at 9pm. Parents got to meet me and see my home so they felt comfortable having their child come over and vice versa. The kids always had a lot of fun and it’s a great way for them to begin to bond.

For enrichment try these classics:

Begin in the early years: 16 Encouraging Books About Making Friends

Outschool offers classes on Friendship Skills (plus more than 150,000 other classes on every topic under the sun, for kids ages 3 to 18 through small, live classes.)

Read Dale Carnegie’s famous classic “How to Win Friends and Influence People” book.  Play the audio version while driving to and fro. He wrote one for teen girls.  Asking questions, getting people to talk about themselves, and not interjecting your own “story” is Dale Carnegie’s sure fire way to make friends. Role play this with your children. Help their imaginations soar. Pretend you are a baseball player, artist, astronaut, stonemason, fireman, and let them be the questioner and vice-versa! Have fun.

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