Let’s Talk Parenting: Growing Gratitude as a Family
Parenting brings moments of joy and connection, along with times when you may feel tired, frustrated, or worried. When the news feels overwhelming, staying positive about the world your children are growing up in can be difficult. Being grateful does not mean ignoring challenges. It means noticing small moments you appreciate, such as a shared laugh, a kind gesture, or time together, even on difficult days.
This monthly article provides tips for anyone helping raise children, based on the world-renowned Triple P Positive Parenting Program, available to families in Santa Cruz County. For questions or ideas for a future column, email triplep@first5scc.org.
Here are some positive parenting strategies to help your family practice gratitude.
Take care of yourself. Parenting can feel more manageable when your own needs are being met. If you’re stressed about things happening in your community and around the world, set limits on news and social media and notice how you feel afterward. If you feel overwhelmed, take a break to go for a walk, talk with someone you trust, or enjoy a quiet moment. Make time for activities you enjoy, even if it is just a few minutes, and ask for support when you need it. Taking care of yourself can help you feel more prepared to respond to your children calmly and positively.
Spend quality time together. Small moments of connection can make a difference. When your child approaches you, try to pause what you are doing and give them your attention, even for a few minutes. Listen to what they want to share, ask questions, or join an activity they enjoy.
During meals, walks, or bedtime, invite everyone to share something they appreciated that day, such as playing with a friend or receiving help. Share your own example, too, and let children participate in their own way without pressuring them to feel thankful.
Notice what is going well. Try these ideas:
- Write down something you appreciate each day.
- Create a family gratitude jar with notes and drawings.
- Include everyday moments, such as someone helping you or your child trying something new.
These reminders can help you recognize positive experiences alongside challenges. Thank the people who support your family. Busy schedules can make it easy to overlook each other’s efforts.
Try these ways to show appreciation:
- Thank your partner, relatives, friends, or other caregivers for the everyday things they do.
- Be specific about what the person did and how it helped: “Thank you for making dinner. It helped our evening feel less rushed.”
- Include others who support your family, such as teachers, coaches, or neighbors.
- Small expressions of thanks can help everyone feel valued and strengthen the relationships that support your family.
Model gratitude and use descriptive praise. Let your children hear you thank others.
When they do something kind or helpful, describe what you appreciate: “Thank you for putting your toys away. That helped us get ready for bedtime.” Descriptive praise helps children understand which positive behaviors to keep practicing.
Give yourself credit, too. Parenting does not require perfection. Recognize your efforts, whether you stayed calm during a difficult moment, asked for support, or took time to listen to your child.
Be specific when acknowledging your progress: “I felt frustrated, but I paused before responding.” Small steps matter, even when a day does not go as planned. Keep your expectations realistic, speak kindly to yourself, and give yourself opportunities to learn and try again.
A thought to take with you: Giving thanks can begin with one small moment each day. By taking care of yourself, connecting with your children, and showing appreciation, you help create a positive family environment.
This monthly column provides tips for anyone who is helping raise children, based on the world-renowned, scientifically proven Triple P – Positive Parenting Program, available to families in Santa Cruz County with children ages birth to 16, including children with special needs. Triple P is available locally, thanks to a partnership between First 5 Santa Cruz County, the Santa Cruz County Health Services Agency (Behavioral Health Services Act), and the Santa Cruz County Human Services Department.
If you have a question or idea for a future column, please email Triplep@first5scc.org. Follow @triplepscc on Facebook and @triplepsantacruz on Instagram
